Loved this and thought I’d share it!
Jeromee Adkins stay at home mom/social worker
YMCL: What’s Your Story?
We met at Prairie View University. I was in summer school and so was he. I was the virgin and he was a drugee (had no clue at the time). All I knew was that he smoked weed and I didn’t seem to mind. Until we met on the basket ball court, he asked could he play with me and some random guy I was randomly talking to lol. I told him I didn’t care and he immediately got in the game talking smack I was like who is this dude??! Trying to do crossovers all over me and such! That’s when I realized he was def flirting with moi lol one move made me quit the game though altogether. He wiped his sweat all over me as if he was hugging me….seeing as I didn’t know him but for all of 30min I was outraged yet turned on at the same time hehe. So I acted as if I was grossed out…at that time lol I didn’t want him to think he could get me *snap* just like that so I played tough . He offered me water but of course like the good Christian virgin that I was, everything was a bout getting the nookie lol so I asked him what he think I was and why he trying to set me up??! He pleaded that it was just a simple act of kindness from him to me. Well after he said this several times I finally agreed and for my safety I told my roommate where I was headed just in case I don’t come out alive!!!!!!
I went up and he poured me a cup of water but it was too much so I was putting it over the sink to put it out and he grabbed it and drunk the rest of my water. I was in shock and disbelief and he was like what??! I was just staring at him saying to myself he doesn’t know me or know if I’m terminally ill or anything like he is just too comfortable with me..weird but I like lol So we definitely started making out like we were in a movie and some guys walked in on us so I ran out like a white girl lol smh still embarrassed by that til this day. But anywho if I didn’t I probably would’ve been just another smash to him. So he ran after me and we made out all the way to my dorm by this time it was like 1a.m. Mind you I had class the next day so as much as I wanted that moment to last I had to go home. The next morning my friend asked me 21 questions and I went to class. Eager to hear from him or see him the next day I approached the bball court where we agreed to meet that day and he was there sitting waiting for me.
I tried so hard not to CHEESE when I saw him but when our eyes connected I just had to and so did he. Man the chemistry was amazing people were looking at us like we were a couple, how so sincere our hug was. He was smoking a cigarette on the bench and I realized he omg he does something I can’t stand. We created small talk, while I was blushing the whole time and we made a time and date to meet for the following day because he didn’t have a cell phone. But I avoided him the next day, I think because after seeing the cigarette I got a little turned off and I thought if I ignored him then he would ignore me and whatever we had it couldn’t be real because he would’ve chased me. These were the thoughts going through my head. So he FB me and messaged me for two days and by the third day I felt so guilty, because earlier he’d seen me walking with one of my classmates and he stopped and hugged me so deliciously so I felt horrible. So I was hoping I would hear from him on FB that day so we could talk.
I was feeling down, and I practically stayed on there until he got on lol he did and we started messaging each other asking serious questions about dating and such. My excuse for not dating him was a pathetic one. I pretty much didn’t want to get involved with him because he wasn’t the best looking to me at that TIME lol and he had flaws (weed smoker, and drinker). But he said he really liked me because I was a good girl and I was raised right and that’s what he needed in his life..after seeing I should just give him a chance we started seeing each other every single day!! Then I felt like I was ready to give up my virginity and he treated me like a queen so he was my test dummy…yeah u used him and it just so happened to be his birthday the day I gave it to him.
If I go into detail it would turn into a Zane novel and that is NOT what you want !!! Put it like this, it was so gentle and sweet. My first impression of him during my first time was amazing. He had me feeling like I was the only girl in his world. But I started avoiding him again because I was thinking maybe he didn’t think much of me anymore since I finally gave him the nookie…he probably just like all the other dudes, wanna “hit it and quit”. Then a couple of days passed and I was yearning to see him so I acted like I was taking the trash out. The dumpsters are by the bball court and that was “our spot” so I knew I would see him. Well, he wasn’t there! I was sad and mad at the same time. So the next day I did the same thing and he was there!!!! I hugged him and he said he missed me, and where I’d been? I kept calm and acted like I was super busy with school. That’s when I knew it was official and I introduced him to the fam.
YMCL: When did you “just know” ?
JA: I just knew when he told me that we were bf and gf the night of consummation…it was weird but he was forreal. Plus January 2010 I found out I was pregnant with my first born!! He said he wanted to marry me anyways so let’s do it!!
YMCL : How Did he propose?
JA: He was asking me all types of questions about what type of ring I want and all and I’m just answering nonchalantly not knowing he was on his way to Walmart. I’m feeling miserably in my first trimester and he comes in smiling and all and I’m like what are you doing goofiness and he proposes saying it was only $100 but I love you more than that and when he gets in a better position we will get another. I didn’t care!! I loved it!! Sported it like it was yellow gold! Still got it too!
YMCL : How’s Married Life?
JA: married life is bitter sweet! A roller coaster is what it is!! Lol beautiful when the love is genuine and is in Christ, ugly when Christ is on the back burner and marriage is just a piece of paper you got to shut ppl up. It’s lovely when you genuinely want to be with that one person and not every other girl and you come home to your main. You just have to be ready for what life throws at you and your spouse pretty much whether it be floozies, financial issues, homelessness, unemployment etc. This will answer number
YMCL: What do you wish you knew about marriage before taking that step?
JA: Nobody tells you that if one spouse going through something then we are both affected by it and you cannot leave the situation as if you were bf/gf. So if he homeless bc of unemployment then you are too. You cannot blame one or the other because we are in this together so we both are to blame. I wish I knew everything about my spouse because a lot if things could have been avoided such as, drug abuse that I was unaware of besides the fact the he smoked weed. Weed was acceptable to me before our children came after that it was just another bill that takes away from me and mine SMH.
YMCL: What advice would you give readers considering marriage?
JA: Marriage can be a beautiful struggle as long as you struggling with the right person. God smiles on marriages that are in him, and marriage is more of a beautiful struggle when god is in the mix because blessings stay flowing because you are struggling together as one and in unity. I don’t know if I’m making sense or not . Quit listening to other peoples marriages and drawing a bad conclusion about your love life and stop letting your vision be tainted by others experiences. Nothing can prepare you for it, in this case experience is actually the best teacher!!
Breah McClendon, the 18 yr old freshman at Prairie View A&M recently featured on World Star Hip Hop for dancing nude in a pond.
Took to popular social media site Instagram citing she was a victim of sexual abuse. “…. I was molested by my dad when I was 11 that was the first time I gave oral sex it wasn’t consensual. The next year he raped me….” McClendon said.
I heard so many people talk about how nasty, trifling, and sad she is. How her attempt to defend herself sharing that she was molested and raped by her father and others was “just an excuse” or “didn’t excuse what she did”.
“I claimed to be a virgin…I didn’t wanna tell people how I lost my virginity at 12…after that I started getting sexually assaulted by people I went to school with…” she wrote.
It is my opinion that the effects of said abuse led to the video that’s now plastered all over the internet.
Excuse? I think not- many may feel that abuse wouldn’t make them personally do what she did.
But as a survivor of years of sexual abuse I am here to say that it could.
In the same manner that any other form of abuse (drug, physical, emotional) effects the mind, therefore one’s actions; sexual abuse effects this young lady and many like her.
This is deeper than the pictures of her performing oral sex, deeper than “twerking” nude. Her mind is re wired, and very damaged. Her hurt is her drug, her desire to please people specifically men is her drug, her sexual confusion is her drug.
And she needs help! Not people throwing stones, who only see the results of an experience she had no control over. In fact she still has no control, she is out of control. She needs someone to let her know that she can take control of herself now.
I personally want to meet and encourage her.
However, If I don’t get the pleasure to I hope she gets the support she needs. I am rooting for her come up and comeback! Not as the “PV Pond Girl” but as Breah McClendon [Insert Extraordinary title here.]
Glamour interviewed couples all around the world, in this article 23 couples are represented. It’s cute and quite informative!
YMCL: When did you “just know”?:
YMCL: How did he propose?!!
Quetta: I drove Nick to the flea market off of 45 one day. He got out and I stayed in the car, about 30 minutes later Nick came back. He got in the car and I was getting ready to drive off but he told me to stop. He took my left hand and asked me “would I marry him?” . First of all, I didn’t believe him because we both play way too much, I mean we’re goofy what can I say?! I knew we had talked about it but I still didn’t take him seriously. Nick had a ring in a black box and he opened it and asked again “will you marry me?” I responded YEEEEEESSSSSSS! I was so excited, he slid the ring on my finger and I couldn’t believe it! I remember it like it was yesterday. The ring wasn’t fancy nor expensive, but I loved it because it came from my best friend and the love of my life.
Quetta: Nick and I planned our wedding in two months, and a big wedding at that. I couldn’t wait to be his wife so we made it happen. Marriage now is awesome and I wouldn’t change it for anything not even our hard times together. Our hard times have made our marriage stronger and made us realize that we cannot live without one another. Marriage now is peaches and cream, we communicate more, we appreciate each other more and so on. I have married my best friend and a very good man. I have the best of both worlds and I love my marriage.
YMCL: What do you wish you knew about marriage before taking that step?
Gerald Rogers, gives marital advice after his divorce is finalized. Below is a link to his video on the Today Show!
Good Morning Lovers!
I call you lovers because that’s what we are in my opinion, we all love someone or something ;).
I just want to take a moment to welcome you to YMCL!! I’m so excited to share stories about young couples and their love. I am not yet married but it’s a desire of mine 🙂 however, I’m still very passionate about building love and relationships.
I hope that will permeate through the stories I share with you all.
I’m a talker, so I’m going to wrap it up here but for any couples who’d like to be featured on YMCL check out the Contact page !
Ahhhh home, the place you can go and unwind from a long day of whatever. The place you can take off the attire the world sees us in and put on the comfy clothes the ones we love recognize us in.
The place you come up with the rules or help enforce them, a comfortable, peaceful, familiar place. You know that place you think of and it brings you feelings of joy, support, and safety.
How did you create that “Home Sweet Home” feeling as a couple moving in with one another ?
*Comment Below to share your stories*
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage the little things are the big things…
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
it should continue through all the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude
of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciation
and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience,
understanding and a sense of humor.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal,
dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.
Symbols of a union